Thursday, January 22, 2009

Logic Check: Vegetarians

I have never understood why someone would want to be a vegetarian. So I created a list of some reasons that I've heard.

1. Animals are alive.

2. Animals have feelings.

3. Animals are unhealthy.

4. Plants are made for people to eat.

5. Animals have faces.

These are all valid reasons, but they all apply to plants too. If a person follows these rules, then he can't eat anything. Let's examine each of the reasons.

1. Plants are alive too.

2. Just because animals move more than plants doesn't mean that they have more feelings. According to this logic, people in comas don't have feelings because they don't move. Is it okay to eat them? By being a vegetarian a person is insulting these people! I'm appalled.

3. Everything is unhealthy in some way. Some meat has a lot of fat, but you have to get the protein from somewhere, and milk and eggs have much more fat than lean turkey meat.

4. Most animals wouldn't be born if we didn't eat them. What else do you think we would use cows and pigs for? Purfume?

5. Plants have faces too!

If you're not going to eat animals, then for the same reasons you can't eat plants. So if you're contemplating a major dietary alteration, please stop and think about it logically.

I'm not trying to be rude and I hope that I don't offend anyone. I actually respect vegetarians for the devotion that they give to their ideals. It just seems a little misplaced to me.

So remember; in addition to animals and people in comas, plants have feelings too.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Color of the Week: Tangerine

Things that are this color:

Tangerines
Crayons




Why make a crayon for a color if only one object in the world is that color? This makes no sense. If anyone can think of anything else that is tangerine, please leave a comment about it.

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Martian Invasion Postponed

For some reason, Ned the Martian isn't acting as nefarious as I had expected. I guess that he's waiting until next year to call his army to invade the Earth. For now, he must have absorbed into the earth to act has a homing beacon to his people. So get ready: the martians are coming!